I'm not the most sociable person... I never have been, online you may think otherwise however in real life I am a very introvert person. I like to keep myself to myself and have always been really shy until I get to know someone. I hate speaking to people I don't know face to face or on the phone and avoid having to do so as much as I can. I let phone calls go to voice mail so I don't have to speak to them unless its someone I know. Maybe it's my insecurities that are talking here but I hate being around people all the time, I'm afraid I'll have nothing interesting to say as I'm very self conscious.
When Amelia was born I began going to baby groups and play dates and this resulted in meeting other mums and having to speak to various new people including health visitors, doctors, etc and I didn't mind so much anymore. I began to feel much more comfortable in myself and not so shy. Fast forward a couple of years and I found myself pregnant again and once again hid myself away. It wasn't that I didn't want to meet people I just genuinely couldn't be bothered going anywhere or having to speak to anyone I didn't know. I stopped going out on my own or with Amelia unless I necessarily had to and became very anti-social.
Since Harrison was born, I suddenly felt like a new person. I'm not sure what it was, but all of a sudden I had this whole new bout of confidence in me and I wanted to get out of the house, go places, have fun with the kids and meet new people! I've been going to playgroup and I've already signed up for a mother and baby gym class when I turn 6 weeks postpartum which I'm looking forward to. I have been getting out a lot more lately with the kids on my own, whether it be to the play centre, park or for a walk in the forest when I have the car.
I'm looking forward to the summer and enjoying the rest of my maternity leave off before returning to work in October. I can't wait to take the kids places, do new things, explore and most of all spend it in their company and make memories. I'm definitely planning on making the most of it as I feel like I wasted last summer which is such a shame, but I'm glad my confidence is back and I finally snapped out of it.