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When is it the right time for Baby #2?


I've been noticing lately a lot of mums with toddlers the same age as Amelia announcing pregnancies or popping out babies and it's slowly dawning on me that Amelia is no longer a baby anymore! It got me thinking... When's the right time for another baby? Are we ready to have another baby? Do I even want another baby? So many thoughts and questions have been running through my head along with major baby fever! 

Many people ask "So, when are you having another baby"..."Will Amelia be having a little brother or sister any time soon?" The answer is simply - "I don't know". I always think to myself don't be so bloody rude but in all honestly Amelia is now 15 months, many mums have two children at this age, my mum did with me and my brother and I have many friends who all have two babies under 2. Although I don't think I could juggle two that close in age I would like another - just not yet. 

There are so many things to consider when thinking of expanding a family, here are some that I have been pondering over. 

Can we afford to have another baby?

Of course we would be able to manage but are we financially able to afford another baby? If Amelia would still be in nappies that means double the amount of nappies. What if I couldn't breastfeed this baby? That would mean splurging out on bottles and formula. We would be set on clothes and baby products if we were to have another girl but if we had a boy we would have to buy many new items. If I was to go back to work after my maternity leave would we be able to afford child care? If not would we be able to live of just one wage if I were to become a stay at home mum for a couple of years? 

Is Amelia ready to become a big sister?

In reality Amelia is still a baby herself, how would she react to having a baby brother or sister and not being the center of attention? Some babies develop behavioural problems when their parents introduce another member to the family. I know many families have a smaller age gap some with even a newborn and a one year old - god knows how they manage, but Amelia would be at least 2 and a half before another baby is on it's way over here so I don't think it would be too much of a problem. She will understand more then and hopefully won't mind the limelight being taken off her slightly. Of course we will love both babies just as equally but I've heard that many older babies tend to feel left out when a new baby enters the family.

What is my heart telling me?

The truth is sometimes's you just need to go with your heart and think is it the right time. I often ask myself is my heart telling me that I'm ready for baby number two? The main concern for us is will we be able to financially afford another baby yet? We are moving house and that wouldn't be an issue as we have plenty of space but with our monthly bills increased and if I were to leave work we wouldn't be able to afford this on just Andy's wage especially with all of our other bills too and plus I wouldn't get maternity pay as i've not long started my new job.

So to answer my own question... I still don't know when we will be ready for baby number two, although we would very much like Amelia to have a baby brother or sister. I guess it will happen when the time is right.

Did you have any worries when wanting to expand your family? Have you got baby fever?


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20 comments

  1. I couldn't even imagine having baby #1 right now. The main reason for me is that my fiance and I definitely don't have the finances to take care of a baby. Heck, we can barely support ourselves. It would be very tough. I always say it'll happen when it's supposed to happen, which hopefully is far away for me!

    http://skinstuffbykaty.blogspot.com/

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  2. We decided not to wait after our first was born. Our second ended up being 19 months younger than our first and I'm glad it turned out that way. It was pretty tough for a while but it's been worth it since they are so close and always have someone close in age to play with, all day, every day. Our third will be born 3.5 years after our second and I think that will always be a nice gap in age. We never worried about "if we could afford it" too much. There is never a perfect time and there will always be financial ups and downs. It's more important, to us, to grow our family and have our kids close together. Financially things have always worked out.. even if you have to budget a little more now and then.

    http://www.nadanadalimonada.com

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  3. I think that, as much as I'd love another, I want to ensure that I have the financial set-up that I didn't have the first time around. I think William will probably be three by the time we have another. But that's fine with me - we get to prepare this time and I get some more one-on-one time with my little Bill. xxx

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  4. I have two who are two years (less one day) apart. I wanted a smaller age gap than me and my sister (three years) but not so small that I had two babies. I was fine with everything until halfway through my pregnancy (which was a very difficult one) a "friend" sent me a poem about how sad my other son would be having to share me! I was filled with guilt for the rest of my pregnancy! Of course the poem couldn't be more wrong and they adore each other, but you're right ~ people really need to be a bit more respectful. Whenever you feel in your heart is right, I believe...after all, we're the ones raising them :)

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  5. I had all these same worries as you and I didn't think I would fall pregnant as quickly with LL so quickly. Now she is here though I love the age gap of my girls. I don't ever think there is ever a right or a wrong time- just go wiht your heart! x

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  6. We were planning on having our second baby around the time my son turned 3 so that I wouldn't have a newborn and the terrible twos to deal with at the same time plus I kept putting off having another as my sons birth was so horrific that I was quite scared to do it again however my little princess had other ideas and decided to surprise us, I discovered I was pregnant a couple of months before my son's 2nd birthday which meant he was closer to 2 and a half when she was born and it's been very difficult at times but you manage and I wouldn't have it any other way now :) xx

    Emma
    Handbags To Change Bags - Mummy & Lifestyle Blog

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    1. I completely wrote that wrong, start again! I reckon she is ready if you decided to have another, kids grow up a lot in 9 months, especially at that age. I always wished I had've had a brother or sister!

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  8. All I know is that we'll never be ready for #2. We made the decision to only have one. I've been called selfish for this as apparently I'm denying Lucas company and that he'll suffer. It should be noted that as I write this, I have 4 of Lucas's friends in our back garden having a water fight so he's not exactly lonely!!!!!! Good Luck hun and will definitely be waiting to see what decision you make xx

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  9. I would like baby #2 but my daughter is to much to handle and is 7, its a massive decision to take and to be honest are we ever ready for babies ?? x

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  10. I totally understand how you feel! I have baby fever, but at the same time I want to give my daughter the attention she needs right now and I know that I would be overwelmed if I had two under the age of two. My daughter is 20 months now, so I do feel like if I were to get pregnant now it would not be the end of the world because she would at least be over two. And I understand that its something for people to ask about, but I don't want to be pressured into trying to have another. So I don't know either if I'm ready or not.

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  11. I think there are positive and negative points to all age gaps between siblings. Iyla was 2 and 3 months when Jobey was born and in a way I think had she been younger she might have adjusted quicker but then I think it would have been a lot more work as they both would have seemed more like babies. We are nearly five months in now and things are a lot more settled and although they aren't easy, it's a lot easier than I thought it would be. For the first few months Iyla went through a bad phase and Jobey seemed like the easy one but now he is teething and a bit of a moaner but luckily Iyla has returned to her normal self. Plus watching the two of them together now Jobey is starting to laugh at her is so adorable, not looking forward to the arguments once he starts crawling towards all her toys though! xx

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  12. I don't have baby fever but my friend recently had triplets so its hard to remain sensible with such gorgeousness x 3. They planned to have another baby but got pregnant with 3. I don't think there's ever a right time to have a baby, just go with the flow and let nature take its course, 9 months later. Tadah!

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  13. I've recently had my implant removed and we are just going to see what happens. As you know Thomas is a bit younger than Amelia and for us it feels right like you we are moving in to a bigger house and David has recently had a promotion at work and our plan now is to have another sooner rather than later so that I will go back to work full time sooner which means we can start saving for a house deposit sooner. I am a little worried about how Thomas will take to another baby and in the past he's gone mad when I've held my friends baby but I guess he will have to get use to it one day x

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  14. PS your bump was amazing so neat

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  15. My number one baby is now 14...life didn't plan out the way I thought, and now, as I near my 40s I'm longing for baby #2 and possibly 3.......I hope ♥

    I have serious broodiness with a 10mth old niece, and another niece due any moment now...plus everyone on my FB seems to have babies or are pregnant...

    I guess there is never really a right time. There are 2 ish years between my sis and I and 4 years between my hubs and his sis. Thing is, there are 13 years between me and my brother...so any time can be the right time I guess? x



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  16. Rio is 16 months and this month is the first month of trying for baby number 2.. its soo scary to think of having too but i keep reminding myself this will be 9months+ down the line. Theres nothing i love more than watching Rio interact with other toddlers, so it will be amazing to watch! I think everyone is different..and each gap is perfect for every couple. When its meant to happen it will :)

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  17. I'm already getting "Ohh, wait til you've got 3 kids, you think it's bad now.." . my first is only 1 month old! So I know how you feel hah :')

    Loti from http://whatcharliewore.blogspot.com

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  18. thats a good question! i always wanted number 2 to be very close in age to Finn and we started trying when he was around 18 month but we shortly stopped again for personal reasons i am now pregnant with number 2 due in 4 weeks and Finn is 3.5 years. it might be a bigger gap then i originally wanted but he is way more aware of what is going on and i think he will love being a big brother and helping out with the new arrival!

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Thank you so much for taking the time to leave a comment. I love reading them all and will try my best to answer all of your questions. If you would like to contact me for a quicker response please feel free to tweet me at (@ohsoamelia_blog) or email me. Kerry