There's nothing worse than your toddler throwing a tantrum in public, random passers by staring at you with a screaming kid on the floor and you're stood there ignoring them hoping that they will stop. Even though Amelia has only just turned 15 months she has had her fair share of temper tantrums, and I know this is nothing compared to the "terrible two's" we still have all of that to come yet!
However, at this very young age Amelia is a very demanding little girl, she certainly knows what she wants and if she doesn't get it she will make us know that she isn't happy. Whether this be by screaming at the top of her lungs, throwing herself back on the floor or stomping her feet she most certainly knows how to express her self. Most of the time she will stop a minute later and is only after attention however the majority of the time she can be a right little madam!
A tantrum is an expression of your toddler's feelings. It's not the best way to deal with at the time, but how is a toddler supposed to know that? But they are simply trying to communicate how they are feeling. There are many reasons for your toddler to have a tantrum, here are the most common ones:
- Want to be the one in control
- Can't express what they want or need
- Trying to be independent
- Hungry, tired, thirsty etc
Here are some simple tips that I have learnt on how to cope when your toddler is in the midst of a full scale tantrum:
Stay calm - Take a deep breath. If you need to put your toddler in their cot, shut the door and stand outside. Take a few minutes to calm down and think about the situation. Many of times I have placed Amelia in her magicbed or cot if she is having a tantrum to stop her from injuring herself and to also give me a breather!
Don't give in! - Don’t give into tantrums. If they learn that tantrums will get them what they want, they will repeatedly use this tactic which won't be good in the long run.
Try and ignore onlookers - The best thing to do in this situation is to ignore other people. Some people can be extremely judgmental and nosey. There's nothing worse than someone watching your toddler throw a tantrum and seeing how you resolve it. Focus on your toddler, not on what other's may be thinking.
Distract them - When your toddler is upset about not getting to do something or getting their own way, distract them with something else. It is amazing how well this works and how quickly they forget they are upset.
Offer limited choices - Don’t just ask what they want to do, give them a couple of alternatives and let them decide. This helps your child make some decisions on their own.
Help them with words - Sometimes your toddler can't express what they want or how they feel. They simply can't tell you want they are trying to do. The best option is to ask them or tell them what they are doing. For example if your toddler is climbing up onto the sofa and has a tantrum. Ask them "Are you trying to get up on the sofa" "Help" and " Up" would also be good words to use in this situation. They will most likely respond. Over time they will understand and be able to communicate with you.
Reassure your toddler that you are there if they want you. Say "Mummy is here if you want a cuddle when you calm down" or something similar. That way they will know that you are not mad and sometimes can reduce the period of time they have a tantrum for.
Did/does your toddler have tantrums? How do you deal with them?
* Disclaimer - I am no expert, this is what has worked with us and our experiences. They may not work for you, I am just sharing my knowledge.
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